The Loneliness of Beauty
The only thing more annoying than somebody complaining about being beautiful is someone complaining about being rich. Trust me… that sentiment is not lost on me. For those who have been judged or excluded based on their looks, I can see the eye roll from a mile away. If you ask any conventionally attractive person if they would trade places with someone who isn’t considered attractive by societal standards, they most likely wouldn’t, regardless of how inconvenient their physical appeal may be at times.
But the reality is… looks can only take you so far. And the price of beauty comes with a sense of loneliness that is rarely acknowledged. Yes, people are more likely to want to be your friend. You may have a line of people waiting to date you. But how many of those connections are actually genuine? Do they actually like you, or is being seen with you giving them some sort of superficial leverage? You think you are connecting with someone on a philosophical level, only to find out they’re really just conversing with you in hopes of winning you over romantically. You think you have real guy friends, when really they’re just trying to fuck you. You think you have sincere girl friends, but they only see you as competition and are ready to steal your man (or think you want their man, for Christ’s sake). They may go as far as to date your ex, not because they’re attracted to him, but to gain proximity to you. —Thanks, patriarchy!
The men you date put you on a pedestal, only to be disappointed when you reveal the first human flaw. It’s emotionally taxing. Being constantly lusted after rather than loved. Your intelligence, depth, and creativity are often unacknowledged. But of course, you’ve got pretty privilege, so it should be smooth sailing, right? I’d save the “pity-party” if it were as liberating as it sounds. Your heartbreaks are seen as trivial. Betrayals toward you are downplayed as if they don’t cut as deep. All due to the perception of easy replacements.
So you move on to your next friendship or relationship, questioning: Is this real? Do I have something substantial that will feed my soul? As Edna from The Incredibles said, “When you’re ugly, you know people like you for you.” In the end, you often wonder if your connections are authentic or if you’re just another trophy. Who’s the real winner here — the trophy, the one vying for it, or are we all stuck in a game where no one is allowed to win?
